Thursday, January 15, 2009

You've Got To Be Joking

Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s Sports Shorts.

Kate Hudson has been spotted on dates with Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez and PGA golfer Adam Scott during the past week. It’s nice to see that someone is picking up Alyssa Milano’s slack.

The Lions have reached out to Dolphins assistant coach Todd Bowles regarding their coaching vacancy. The news comes as a surprise to many insiders who thought the team would already be onto the “C” section of the phonebook by now.

Knicks center Eddy Curry has been accused of trying to solicit gay sex from his driver. It’s a surprising accusation for a player who’s never shown much interest in sticking to his man.

Ricky Henderson has been elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. In related news, more than a dozen of the museum’s artifacts have already been stolen.

Dallas Cowboys linebacker Anthony Spencer was arrested for making a disturbance outside a downtown Indianapolis nightclub. On the positive side, it sounds like Pacman Jones has found himself a brand new wingman.

The Detroit Tigers have signed Taiwanese pitcher Fu-Te Ni to a multimillion dollar contract. It’s believed to be the most money ever spent on a product made in Taiwan.

China has announced plans for a National Fitness Day on August 8th. The government will commemorate the day by encouraging workers to engage in a strenuous physical activity during their two minute lunch breaks… whether they want to or not.

The Yankees have announced they will wear a special patch on their uniforms commemorating the inaugural season at their new stadium. The black and white design will feature a dollar sign being flushed down a toilet.

Pirates chairman Bob Nutting recently told reporters that an MLB salary cap would make Pittsburgh more competitive. It’s certainly a more feasible plan than his previous idea of giving polio to the league’s other 29 teams.

The Los Angeles Dodgers have released Andruw Jones. However, the team intends to still pay tribute to the rotund slugger by using his jersey to cover the infield during rain delays.